Sunday, September 18, 2005

Ladki Pataao algorithm

Ladki Pataao algorithm (Beta release)

Just follow following steps.........

1. Search for a nice girl. Find a way to talk to her. Finding a reason depends on your skill.You have to find a reason
because she would never approach no matter how frustrated she is .

2. If you don't succeed got to step 1 again .

3. Start with some concrete point and slowly slowly shift to her personal details.

4. Ask her for coffee like: "You are busy right?".She will say "No". and then "You don't like coffee?". No direct thing like "Would you
please come for coffee with me?"

5. Asking for lunch: When she has finished her lunch, approach her and ask "Had lunch?". She will say "Yes". Than say "Hey, you
didn't call me". Next day she will call you.No direct pleading like: "Please have a lunch with me."

6. Well, how to ask for having coffee outside(in some café): Tell her that this coffee is not good. Tell some technical reason. Then tell
her that that café nearby serves a damn good coffee. Next day either she will ask or you ask her in some indirect fashion.

7. When you want her to take on some outing..."You know last evening it was really a great fun. We all friends went to ABC park.
It's a beautiful place..cool breeze..Complete silenece..no clamouring..No rush..Wow..We enjoyed a lot."Hopefully next time she will
ask herself to take her to that place.if she doesn't, ask "Hey lily, we are going to ABC park. Are you coming?"She will. No
compelling..Nothing..

8. If you don't succeed go to step 5 again.

9. When you cross the road, she needs help..Just hold her hand and help crossing.. This will be your first time when you are touching
her..Dont be excited..Pretent as if everything is normal.Now even after crossing the road don't leave her hand.
Evening while talking.If she throws your hand away..and gets serious..Just get up and sit far from her and say "is that fine
now?"..Show a bit of anger..and make her realize that she is a very backward and has no sense of new society.."Don't know in what
era you are living".

10. If you don't get a chance to hold her hand, just be patient till you drag discussion to some Palmist's story.

11. Now 50% part is finished.

12. Keep on playing small tricks..Try insinuating thoughts into her mind:"Aishe mat dekho..Pyar ho jayega..hehe:)(followed by
smiles)".

13. Rest is on you..

14. NEVER EVER SAY 'I LOVE YOU'..THIS IS THE MOST FATAL STATEMENT...IF SPOKEN BEFORE COMPLETE FLOURISHMENT OF LOVE. Theory: When you say the things like "I LOVE YOU"," I love you so much"," I can't live without you".It means you have completely given your self into her hands and you are on her sympathy now.She would never fall for you..."Tum bas ek friend ban
kar rah jaoge"... Actually, The whole system is made up of small units having relation of master-slave.(as per Lacan) Once you propose or say the things like "I love you..I can't live without you"..you become slave.
15. If you really want to admire(not adore) her:"Hey, pink color suits you. You are looking cute"."I like the way you say "oh. no... ""...etc
etc."ADMIRE IN INSTALLATIONS".